Inspiration

So today was day 2 of week 1 of my couch to 5K program.  It is soooo hard for me to run.  Today I felt tired before I even started, but I started and that's what counts.  Right?  Anyway along the way I came across to lady who lost 80 pounds in a year by walking!!  We had a nice little chat as we made our way around the track.  I guess I've just failed so many times that it's difficult for me to believe I'll EVER be successful at anything.  Especially running.  I'm probably going to have to do week one for about a month before I can move on.  At least it feels that way.  But I'm out there working at it.  Struggling, struggling along.  I'm not sure why it's so difficult for me to run.  It always has been.  Maybe it's the way I'm built or maybe it's just because I never learned to push myself.  When I was growing up I never had anyone there telling me you can do this.  Mostly I was told you CAN'T do this and so I never did.  But I have a wonderful family and friends now who have faith in me and give me encouragement and I truly hope I won't let them down.  I can't allow myself to let them down, because I'll once again be letting me down too.  Oh what a screwed up childhood can do to a person!  I sure hope I have given my kids a better start in life and alot more self-esteem than I ever had.  I know one thing, I have complete faith and them and tell them everyday that they can do whatever they put their minds and hearts to.  I guess I need to learn to follow my own advice.